The Empress - Creator and Giver of Life and Living.

I am The Empress

Beauty, happiness, pleasure, success, luxury, dissipation.

The Empress is associated with Venus, the feminine planet, so it represents,
beauty, charm, pleasure, luxury, and delight. You may be good at home
decorating, art or anything to do with making things beautiful.

The Empress is a creator, be it creation of life, of romance, of art or business. While the Magician is the primal spark, the idea made real, and the High Priestess is the one who gives the idea a form, the Empress is the womb where it gestates and grows till it is ready to be born. This is why her symbol is Venus, goddess of beautiful things as well as love. Even so, the Empress is more Demeter, goddess of abundance, then sensual Venus. She is the giver of Earthly gifts, yet at the same time, she can, in anger withhold, as Demeter did when her daughter, Persephone, was kidnapped. In fury and grief, she kept the Earth barren till her child was returned to her.

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Merde...

I went to the Cineplex today and found myself in the company of royalty. The King was there and so was The Queen. I am finally mixing with the right crowd… but I still felt downright depressed.

I found out recently that I couldn’t access one of my friend’s Blog. Then I found out that it was because the Blog is now private – only invited friends can view it. But the real one that got me all down in the dumps, despite my newfound blue-blooded company, was the explanation that the Blog was privatized because it was complained against. A report of mass indignation was lodged against the Blog to the Ministry! No less!

All that and just because my friend used the synonym for waste, excrement, dirt, feces, defecation.

Oh dear, I am now scared feces-less. But that was before I wasted on myself due to the shock.

Oh no, I just said those words myself, excrement, excrement, excrement… have I got myself into trouble now… excrement! I am in so much trouble now I should be defecating bricks for the next few days… aurgh…!

See I have so stupidly repeatedly made all those comments knowingly… sigh… I must have stools for brains. I have just wasted on myself… again.

With all this fuss over such a little word that EVERYBODY uses and does EVERYDAY (sure you do, otherwise you would need to see a doctor or a hernia operation or both), I am concerned whether I should let you know that my workplace is going to have a fruit day every week. You see, one of the fruits they will serve is banana, which is also synonymous if not a euphemism for the phallus, penis, the male genitalia.

What’s worse, since it is such a healthy food for moving the bowels and therefore help with the expulsion of bodily excrement, I intend to stuff my mouth about it… should I be saying all these? About stuffing my mouth with big, wholesome, delicious bananas? Those succulent fruits from a huge bush that’s dripping with nourishment?

Oh dear, oh dear… have I gotten myself knee deep in feces? For telling you about my love of bananas and their juicy goodness…? Please, don’t tell anyone about my banana-obsession. It might inspire banana-envy.

But I can’t help it! The banana is such a beneficial food for the body to help it move and excrete waste material, stools, dung, excrement, I just have to shout about it...

“I LOVE BANANAS!!!”

And then stuff my face, no, gorge on one and maybe gag on it... maybe it won’t be so offensive if I say it in a foreign language. Maybe I can say it in French – everything sounds sexy in French, even the word for feces…

“MERDE!!!”

Reminders and Reality.

Child sees flower
Blooming in the bright sunlight
Opens eyes in wonder.

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Life and reality have had a reboot recently and if you are still not convinced, just smell the coffee by tasting the early morning jam for breakfast on the table and get stuck in the early morning traffic jam on the infamous stretch of road along Bukit Timah.

This is the end of the second week of school and this year I have been given a class of primary one boys. It’s surreal. I’ve always thought the position sacred – reserved for experienced and capable teachers. But I was placed instead. I – one who has just graduated from Teaching University and barely six months into the school’s culture and environment.

It’s surreal. I feel like I’ve stepped into a Dali… or even a Miro. Everything is familiar but not quite THERE. Someone up there probably thinks me capable but what I am hoping and working for is that I don’t disappoint the boys. It’ll be horrible if anything goes wrong with the boys in my care.

God, I feel like a over-anxious father.

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Reality reminded me of my resolution and joy of singlehood.

On the train to town today I saw a family of six – a husband, a wife, three very young siblings and a domestic help.

The husband, who is also the father, sat the youngest siblings on his lap, entertaining the child along the journey.

The other two children sat next to each other as they stared out of the train’s window into the streaking darkness beyond, minded by the domestic help.

The wife sat with earphones (or were they earplugs, really?) firmly planted in her ears, staring into space, occasionally fidgeting with her MP3 player. Nonchalant, oblivious, indifferent.

I guess the domestic help is the mother (of the three children).

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I am contented to be alone.

I am happy to adopt.